Cliques: I Just Wasn’t That Girl. The One Who Tried Fitting In

fitting in

Cliques: I Just Wasn’t That Girl.
The One Who Tried Fitting In.

When they made me, they broke the mold. Like, for real. My mom tells me that all the time, I broke her down, wore her out and jumped on her last nerve. Go me! In high school, back in the 80’s when things were way cooler than they are now, I was considered a ‘burn-out’. Which, I think they just call them trouble makers now but that’s a different post. I didn’t play sports in one of the biggest ‘sports’ schools back in Chicago. I wasn’t the know-it-all smart kid with super fantastic grades. I wasn’t even in band… (that one time, at band camp) I just wasn’t one of those people you’d considered  fitting in.

When I started having kids 26 years ago, I found myself a whole new level of not fitting in. I was 18, a  baby having a baby. A teen mom before being a teen mom meant fitting in. Mom’s were all suburban 30 something’s. Popping Valium, drinking wine and making gooey fondue cheesy things I still to this day do not understand why that’s even a thing! Bleh.  Can you picture the other mom’s faces when they saw me, all 80’s Madonna looking, chomping on my gum with my bra outside my T-shirt, showing up to playgroups? <whisper, whisper, got knocked up, whisper, whisper, drop-out, whisper, whisper, whore> Totally not fitting in. But, to be fair, my son did sport that Mohawk like a rock-star and their crotch monkey’s were all way to Granimal, so take that Valium popping suburbanite soccer mom! (did not help with the fitting in, I know!)

Years later, when Grandpa and I moved to that 1 paved road, no McDonald’s or pizza delivery guys small town in the middle of Nowhere, AZ? You guessed it. Not fitting in. Because I was a cultured Chicago girl used to colors, flavors, cussing, brushing my teeth and you know, showering and stuff.  They were white bread, in a tan background with equally tan teeth and if brown(ish) tan had a smell, they were that too.  I needed to talk to people who could form sentences longer than “Yeeeep” and when they did form sentences it didn’t center around Area 51, chewing tobacco and Sarah (screech) Palin. (barf) I totally was not fitting in. We stayed for 12 years until the kids grew up and moved out and I was either getting the heck out of dodge or hanging myself. Before my teeth turned brown.

And now? Remember the other day when I posted about not fitting in because I’m not a mommy blog? I’m not all pink hearts, rainbows and unicorns with leaky cloth diapers and don’t wear my babies. (I really like to poop alone, not juggling a kid on my knee) I am too old for the blogger drama, and have left more than a few bloggy groups because I wasn’t fitting in. I mean, just because you’re in the Blog Queen Parade and have a fancy tiara, you simply can not call me ‘dear’. I have crotch monkey’s older than you. Not happening blog queen, just not happening.

And, I know my awesome readers probably aren’t aware but for those blogger’s reading this, you know about thos God-awful ‘cliques’ right? How well are you fitting in? I sure as shit am not! Too old for a Mommy Blog, not luxurious enough for a Luxury Living Blog, and don’t get me started on some of those super secret campaign driven Big Bloggers groups. You know, where they compete to get new washing machines, remolded kitchens and drive luxury vehicles. Screw that noise. Grandma Juice ain’t (yes, I said ‘ain’t) drinking the kool-aide, taking your secret sorority pledge or giving my left arm for the sake of fitting in. I can however be talked into throwing my future ex son-in law out to the wolves if there’s any takers. Just sayin’.

I wasn’t really trying. But got a bit discouraged at toning down the bad and amping up the happy, happy, joy joy. I wanted to connect with real peeps who talked my language. I didn’t relish the idea of fitting in to a Mommy Blog. A Luxury Living Blog. I’m Grandma Juice! I’m happy to be fitting in and relating with my ever loyal and FULL OF THE AWESOME readers! You get me, right? We click together like puzzle pieces. In all the ways that make us laugh, cry and commiserate, we belong together. We love our families but they drive us bat shit crazy. We adore our small fry’s but want to hang them in a closet and nap sometimes. Laundry and house cleaning suck and if I never read another post about how happy I am to do it because my man likes a cooking, cleaning, baby making machine I may just puke.

You won’t find that here at Grandma Juice. I’ll be fitting in with those of you that can laugh at the crapola life dishes out. And, if they want to send me a new washer and dryer to help me do that pile of laundry, I sure as shit am taking it! My busted up dryer needs replacing.

Oh… and no kool-aide. Unless it’s purple. I like purple! And for the love of Jose Quervo, take that damn tiara off!

When was the last time you felt the pressure so you’d be fitting in? How’d that work for ya?





  1. Do you know I came by doing something totally different and saw this title, and went “hey sounds like me” and had to read it. So me. I am just me and everyone else can just take it or leave it! I love this post! Pass the Jose Quervo, my family drives me batty too 🙂

  2. We are so related!

  3. Well I am not sure if I fit in or not. You won’t find any baby wearing, koolaid or Jose Quervo on my site. If you’ve got an iced latte, you can feel free to send it on over my way!

  4. Funny you wrote this post. I probably don’t fit in but I am perfectly fine like this! I am my own and free spirited person:)

  5. I never fit in either. I like me that way. I like YOU that way too! <3

  6. I think we should start our own clique!

  7. I don’t fit in well with others either. Great post 🙂

  8. I think you fit in just right to the mommy blogger group ;). You’re the insanely funny tell it like it is mommy blogger. I think we’re all struggling to figure out where we fit in though. I know I struggle with my niche so to speak being the wide age range in children that I have. I think the most important thing is to have a voice and that you have. I always get a kick out of how many times you can bring up Jose Quervo in your posts ;).

  9. I know I don’t fit in and I haven’t fit in. I hang out with the mommy blogger crowd as a way to challenge myself and continue to try new and innovative ideas to grow my blog and readership. I don’t have a baby (and there isn’t one for me in the near future either) and if I did even though I know it would be better for the baby I don’t think I have the patience to cloth diaper. I like pretty things I even like pretty pink things and sometimes sparkly ones catch my eye but I don’t participate in those events because it doesn’t match with my blog niche. I also refuse to talk about the everyday things my dogs do on a daily basis just because I am a pet blogger. I guess I am breaking the mold there and just want to have my own blogging identity.

    That said Davinia and Indiana told me to say if anyone has some kids they want to send out way for a play date the girls would love to play.

  10. I used to worry about not fitting in. I don’t have any kids and might not ever. Totally okay with that! I do find a lot of help and support in the groups, though. They have helped me with several different issues.
    Just be yourself and have fun! 🙂

  11. I’ve never been one of those girls who fit in during high school. Even throughout my adult life, I’ve been the “black sheep.” It took starting a blog to find a place where I kind of fit, mostly because bloggers are so diverse, that there really is no specific mold to fit. I’m totally okay with just being me, as weird or eccentric as that may be! For what it’s worth, I think you rock!

  12. The best post ever!

  13. I totally get what you mean by not fitting in, especially in the blogging scene! I’m not a mother and am not sure I ever will be. I have nothing but admiration and respect to all the moms out there that have made blogging a great business, but it does get frustrating to get email after email saying “Hey Mom’s!’ However, I find the groups to be very helpful and supportive – though you do run into a bit of drama now and then.

    Great post!

  14. I’ve never tried to fit in. Even in High School is was sort of a loner, totally prefer it that way. This was a great post.

  15. I hate it when people expect us to follow the their standard of “what fits in”. I do what I want as long as I don’t hurt people in the process. Kudos to you!

  16. Great post! I’ve never been one of the cool kids but it’s never really bothered me much. All that really matters is that I feel good about myself what I am doing.

  17. Savannah says

    OH this is great!! No sugar coating with you.
    As for fitting in I’m a loner (hope I spelled that right) I couldn’t wait to get out of high school so I didn’t have to pretend to care about all of my “friends” drama. I lost contacting with all but 3 of them, and only because I can be myself around those 3 with out getting the evil eye or being talked about.
    So I agree with you ,to hell with fitting in 🙂


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